My Timothy Leary Post

This post is an experiment. I got my molars out today and I am on percocet. I’m also not wearing my glasses, so I cant really tell whether I misspell. I want to see how good I can be on this crack.

I was given percocet when I had Liam. It totally messed me up. I had never had any kind of drug, save the occasional, you know, glaucoma medicine, back in the day. This percocet in the hospital gave me crazy dreams. I dreamed I was tied to the hospital bed and people were coming in and tapping my teeth. I dreamed someone swaddled up my newborn and put him under a car in a parking lot. But not under the TIRES. He was safe, but under the car. Anyway, that was the reasoning in my dream.

So I’ve been living with thi s abscess since last Saturday. It started out minor, I thought maybe I just needed to floss. No bother. The next day it didnt hurt either, it was just a little tender when I chewed. Again, no biggie. By Monday evening I culdnt eay my dinner. SO I said I’ll call the dentist first thing Tuesday morning. When I woke up Tuesday morning, my face was exploding. They said they could get me in the next day. By the time I was in the dentist office, I was in tears. We were flying to Florida the next day, I couldnt get in for surgery. I was given prescriptions for amoxycillin and Vicodi n. It helped a little, but the throb was always there. Then the abscess started to drain out of my jaw and into my face. My face was huge, hard nad it HURT.  I drugged myself up and kept on truckin. I made an appointment with the oral surgeon for Tuesday (today)

The flights were tolerable, pain-wise, except when we;d land. The pressure made me pray something woiuld burst and leak out of my ears and giv eme some relief. I learned to pop two vicodins and three Advils about half an hour before landing.

So I made it back from FLorida (I have a story to tell you about this humongous asshole on the plane to Palm Beach that you will love. She was horrible and spectcular in her assholery all at the same time). Got home, doped myself up and stayed in bed Sunday night, all day Monday and until it was time to go to surgery today.

And go I went. I wanted to die and I was so thirsty, but you cant drink anything aftyer 7 a.m. They made me rinse with peroxide and I was actually tempted to swallow it. Sop I just closed my eyes and let them do whatever to me and when I woke up all the pain came rushing at me and I started to cry and have chills.  I was led to a post-op recovery room where I could lie on a recliner with a blanket and the nurse explained to me and my dad (who drove, THANK YOU AWESOME DAD) all the drugs and ice pakcs and gauze stuffing and all thjat.

Dad drove me home, I made a beeline for my bed to get the chills off. He went and piced me up a milkshake and my prescriptions. I ate as much as I c9ould of my prescriptions and then took my medicine, drank a huge glass of water (VERY painful, BTW, they did a lot of slicing and dicing in therer, but no stiches! They even have to make an incision in my FACE to get some stuff to drain out, to little avail. So grand, I probaly have cellulitis, which is probabloy eating my face as we speak._ Amycrap, I got myself all outfitted for a snooze and sent my dad home and waited for the percocet to do its thing.

And do its thing it did. I actually felt myself floating up from my bed a little bit. First my legs, then my arms. Percocet is a glorious blessing, brought by special percocet angels in drug heaven. I didnt see my angels, but I think theyhave tinsel halos, gossamer wings and silver hot pants.

Sp I’m in no pain as of this moments. I look GORGEOUS, darling, My face really does feel better. It’s fat though, like the HUey Lewis song about feeling three feet thick. I bet I would have typed this better if I had my glasses, but I’m in no mood to get them. and just because I feel better now doesnt mean I should push it with the gertting in and out of bed. \

So milkshakes and pudding for me and lovely Percocet fairies waiting on me hand and foot and more sleep, aside from the every 20 minute guze change and then the every 4 hour med schedule. I’m turning into a Lifetime movie. The housewife who went in for a simple dental procedure and came out hooked on DRUGS!!!

OK, I’m not now ansd itred of writing. I just wantesd to gwet this stuff down whle I was feeling it.